Humorous Wedding Speech by Brother of the Groom -- Wedding Toasts Roas

Humorous Wedding Speech by Brother of the Groom Good afternoon Ladies and Gentlemen. My name is Bill, Michael's brother. Michael didn't choose me to be in the wedding party in the traditional way. Actually, I drew straws with our other brother Sean. (pause) But just because I'm up here speaking don't for one minute think I was the winner. Laughter I think all went well this morning getting Michael ready for his big day. The condemned man ate a hearty breakfast, but alas I was unable to comply with his last request as a single man due to objections from the S.P.C.A...........Bloody do-gooders! Going back some 30 years my first memory of Michael was that he was small and a bit dribbly – yes that’s right, very similar indeed to how he looked at the church this morning. So it shouldn’t be too hard to believe that he was a deeply ugly baby. So ugly in fact, that when he was born the midwife had to be restrained from slapping my parents. And come to think of it, I recall my mum suffering badly from morning sickness †¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦. right up until Michael’s 1st birthday. I was however very excited at the prospect of having another little brother. Someone I could dress up as a gimp and scar for life - you know, the usual brotherly stuff. But even before he was born he was getting ME into trouble. It was seven months into my mum’s pregnancy and I spotted her arriving back from a hospital check up. I was with dad and... ...t from someone who’s motto is - â€Å"If you don’t like my driving you should keep off the pavements†. Michael, despite all the abuse I've just dealt you, you really are a special person and a true friend as well as a brother. I'm lucky to know you and I'm fortunate you've brought a warm and caring person into my life as well as yours. So seriously, I do hope Michael knows how lucky he is. Not only has he found a beautiful wife who completes a wonderful couple but he's also found someone who wants to live with him for the rest of his life. I managed 14 years and that was more than enough for me! Ladies and gentlemen, please raise your glasses and drink a toast to the health and happiness of Paul and Linda.